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Confessions of a Good Girl

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Stop the Single Shaming!

“Place your heart in the hands of God, and he will place it in the hands of a man who deserves it.” Odds are good you’ve seen something like that going around the internet. If not that, maybe “If you run after God like you run after a man, God will give you a man you won’t have to run after.” These phrases are typically accompanied by a picture of a dapper man gazing intently at the camera, or a carefree young woman in a field at sunset. They make me really mad. Or there’s this one, the first half of which is spot-on and I applaud it whole heartedly—“Until Jesus Christ is the obsession of your heart, you’ll always be looking to mere men to meet needs that only he can fill. Only when you make Jesus Christ your first love will you be ready for a love story that reflects his glory.” The second half, however, breaks my heart. Why? All of these phrases have one thing in common—the implication that God dispenses Godly husbands to women who have achieved a certain level of Godliness.

Expecting Penguins

Back in college, ages and ages ago, I made a friend. And as I got to know her, I realized her life was in constant motion. She switched majors, jobs, churches, boyfriends, locations… always thinking that the next change was what was going to make life wonderful. But she was never quite happy. She’d be excited about the change, it would come, and, next thing you know, something better was coming. I realized something, watching her. She was always expecting life to bring her joy, but she never was looking to God to supply it. So I started praying, for myself, that I would find all my joy in God. Honestly, I didn’t really like the idea. I don’t know about you, but the image I had of someone who was “finding their joy in God” was that of someone who sort of walked around all day with this beatific smile on their face, and was just vaguely happy because “God was with them”. This did NOT sound very appealing to me, but I knew I was supposed to “find my joy in God”, so there I

So Many Fears

I’m afraid. I worry… a lot… sometimes about stupid things, and sometimes about legitimate fears. I suppose most people do, and are simply good at hiding it. Perhaps I am, too, as no one has yet diagnosed me with any phobias. But I’m tired of pretending that I’m fearless, and have all the answers. Guess what?! I’m not and I don’t! ~*~ - I am afraid of eternity. I may very well be the only Christian out there for whom the concept of Heaven is not one of unmitigated bliss. The Bible says Heaven will be wonderful, so I believe that on one level, but on the other hand, the idea of something that never stops, never ends, scares me silly. I was worried there was something seriously wrong with me, spiritually, until I realized that outer space freaked me out just as badly. The previews for that movie, Gravity ? Terrifying. - I’m afraid that I’ll never get married. And it’s not just that I’m a girl and so of course I want to get married. I’m an only child, and both my par

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